The extensiveness. How wrong it was for us, how wicked-hearted. He did not open a box quickly. He would often take three days. He had a sheet rock knife he used to cut through cardboard. He condoned defeat when it rarely suited him on the beach, which wasn't made of all silica but had a lot of plastic in it. A large portion of the world's sand is not plastic. Not a loophole, a hoophole. That is, it is something for you to go through--but it's also a hoop. Another hoop to go through. The hoop was magnetized on its inside. Did you close the flue? Before you left, did you close the flue? You didn't. Perverted. Off to the side. Bespectacled with something made in the dump. She was too lax with me, but that's what I had looked for in a person. I had looked for that and found her. We packed the car and left at night. We listened to something on a tape about lions. They were friendly at first, but, later, the took apart that entire family. They had set up a zagreeba around the campsite. Amazing how that little fence, that little zagreeba of twigs, is often enough to keep out elephants. A creature ran through our camp.
She retroflexed me while I was asleep. Against my wishes. I went to a party where everyone ate too many strawberries. I knew how to imagine what was in their stomachs, and what I saw convinced me that I had not been kind enough to the men that I had met at that tiny busstop. Who would have known that one of them would become a turtle egg poacher. Another learned to order things at a restaurant in a charming way. I did not feel strong enough to lift bags of marbles. These were big bags, and if I were to drop them, I was certain I would never get called back to sing for Jerimp. Jerimp was not intelligent. He was not responsible when it came to anything except getting me on time to my haircut. I had a standing appointment for every other week. When I sat in a seat, I was shocked by how much cardamom I smelled. Where did this come from? I was to ask the mother of the five children how she got them. She said that, five times, she had been looking for something else. Would you open a louvre? What about jalousies? The ends of them must have been aluminum, for they bent so easily.
We played naughts and crosses for our worthwhile lives. Her speech was not measured, but her income was. She gave me a bit of money every month--just so long as I didn't mention what I knew about her hair products. I knew what she put in them before they sold them. Not all of her income was steady. Some of it had to be found in grain silos. Some if it could have made a doorknob a little too slick. Be in space. Wrap your hand in plastic. Look for space. Don't be pathogenic around your children. Take a song and change most of it. Stand up and sing it in the place painted white. If you were to turn, then you would see a large organ painted white. The rule is that you have to wear red gloves to play that organ. The rule is that you have to wear red gloves to touch her. Before she touches you, she will want to blacken her hands with soot. She will want to walk in a gulch and belch. I did not like how she sold all that I had made privately. All that--I had intended to throw it in a river. I had wanted to lift something--but I couldn't place it. Sounded like he had just awoken. Terrible, ugly, shocking. I was too necessary to the operation to be called a remnant.
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