THE FIRST TIME HE SAW MR. KILGALLON HE FELL MADLY IN LOVE WITH HIM

1.
He ran from the place, leaving the quirt, leaving his suitcase, leaving the oak box of money.
Leaving his suitcase, he ran from the place, leaving the quirt, leaving the oak box of money.
He, leaving the quirt, ran from the place, leaving his suitcase, leaving the oak box of money.

2.
A mortgage financier, a forecloser, the father was respectable and tight and a stern, upright collection-plate passer.
The father was respectable and tight--a mortgage financier, a forecloser--and a stern, upright collection-plate passer.
The father, a mortgage financier and a forecloser--was respectable, tight, and a stern upright collection-plate passer.

3.
After Buck Fanshaw's inquest without a public meeting and an expression of sentiment, a meeting of the short-haired brotherhood was held on the Pacific coast, for nothing can be done.
For nothing can be done without a public meeting and an expression of sentiment, a meeting of the short-haired brotherhood was held after Buck Fanshaw's inquest on the Pacific coast.
On the Pacific coast, a meeting of the short-haired brotherhood was held after Buck Fanshaw's inquest for nothing can be done without a public meeting and an expression of sentiment.

4.
With them, carrying a gnarled walking stick, was Elmo Goodhue Pipgrass, the littlest, oldest man I had ever seen.
The littlest oldest man I had ever seen was Elmo Goodhue Pipgrass, carrying a walking stick with them.
With them, carrying a gnarled walking stick, was the littlest, oldest man I had ever seen, Elmo Goodhue Pipgrass.

5.
Wearing a long flannel nightgown around his chest, a nightcap, and a leather jacket over long woolen underwear, he bounded out of bed.
He bounded out of bed, wearing a long flannel nightgown around his chest, a nightcap, and a leather jacket.

6.
Once upon a sunny morning, a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn in the garden quietly cropping the roses.
Once upon a sunny morning, a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn quietly cropping the roses in the garden.

7.
Out of a box on the bed, she removed the gleaming pair of patent-leather dancing pumps, grabbed my right foot, and shoved it into one of them, using her finger as a shoehorn.
She removed the gleaming pair of patent leather dancing pumps, grabbed my right foot, and, using her finger as a shoehorn, shoved it into one of them.

1.
The rear of the car lifted up into the air for a moment, and then it thumped down with a muddy splash.

2.
Then it moved around the side of the car.

3.
At the back, the animal snorted a deep rumbling growl that blended with the thunder.

4.
The big raised tail blocked their view out of all the side windows.

5.
It sank its jaws into the spare tire mounted on the back of the Land Cruiser and, in a single head shake, tore it away.

Then it moved around the side of the car. The big raised tail blocked their view out of all the side windows. At the back, the animal snorted a deep rumbling growl that blended with the thunder. It sank its jaws into the spare tire mounted on the back of the Land Cruiser and, in a single head shake, tore it away. The rear of the car lifted up into the air for a moment, and then it thumped down with a muddy splash.